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AbsurdScrawl


Stories
471

Player Active
2 Jun 17 - 8 Feb 20

Twitter
@AbsurdScrawl

Trucking On! 250!

In -6C weather, Billy mapped out his working day depending on where all the coffee vending vans are located. AND, discreet bushes for the inevitable emergency peeing.
#130story

Pull my finger.
Tim complies.
Sam follows through.

Tim pisses himself laughing

#130story

Eric was struck dumb by the amount of advert breaks on terrestrial TV when he visited his daughter.
Thank god for the BBC licence fee. #130story

He'd been out of Durham prison less than 4hrs before he walked in his local pub. He'd gone 4yr 3m and 7days clean. His taste buds craved.
"Long time no see Bill. The usual?"
"Yes please"
Tim the barman handed him a bag of pork scratchings and a pickled egg

Bliss

#130story

What's going on over there dear? asked Mary
Those loonies have escaped the Paris asylum and are throwing people into the river, said Bill
They're in Seine uttered Mary

#130story

"I can't wait for 2020 to end and 2021 to start," said Fred.

"You've said that purely as the only party you're invited to is on New Year eve," replied Maud

#130story

Bill - "Ready?"
Joe - "Yes. Got my walkie talkie, invisible ink pen, swiss army knife, £100 in £, $, €"
Bill - "Why? You're new job is ESTATE agent, not secret agent."

#130story

Tim found it hard to maintain his dignity after eating a bowl of Brussel Sprouts for lunch. #130story