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PhilJackman


Stories
197

Player Active
11 Nov 17 - 4 Dec 19

Twitter
@PhilJackman

Trucking On! 100!

‘Tom, do you fancy going to the Lord Nelson for their Xmas party?’
‘Splice the mainbrace and lash me to the mast.’
‘I’ll take that as a yes then?’
‘I’ve checked the compass and set my bearing, Sandra.’
On second thoughts, I might give it a miss.’
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‘Looks like you’ve had a visitor in the garden Tom.’
‘Who?’
‘Kevin and he’s left you a little present.’
‘Not again Sandra, if it’s not one end with that dog it’s the other!’
‘You need to speak to Joyce and Peter.’
‘Yep, I don’t know what they feed him!’
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‘I’ve never understood that expression Sandra.’
‘Which one?’
'Curiosity killed the cat.’
‘Perhaps you need to investigate it more Tom.’
‘But that’s the point, it may kill me.’
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'It's just a heavy cold, you'll survive.'
'No, it's man-flu, Sandra. It's a scientifically proven thing.'
'Well is there anything I can do for the patient?'
'No thanks, I'll just sit here and read the paper.'
'So, basically the same as when you are well Tom?'
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'Tom! Tom!'
'Are you calling Sandra? I can't hear you over the clarinet.'
'Tell me about it, I can't hear myself think!'
'Well I have to practice if I am going to realise my true potential.'
'Can you not play something different? A tune would be nice!'
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‘What’s this blond hair on your jacket Tom?’
‘What, where? Oh that.’
‘It’s certainly not one of mine.’
‘I think I must have picked it up from Kevin next door.’
‘Kevin? He’s a chocolate lab. That would be a miracle!’
‘They do happen Sandra.’
‘Not around here they don’t!’
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‘It’s good to establish a routine once you’ve retired.’
‘I thought you’d only semi-retired Tom?’
‘Yes, you know what I mean, you need routine to keep you going.’
‘Like sitting on the sofa all morning while I run around tidying up?’
‘Well, something like that Sandra!’
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'Peter brought me some brown cheese back from Norway.'
'Ah he's back from his trip then, Tom.'
'Yes, last night , it's called brunost I think.'
'Did he have a good time?'
'I didn't ask, he had me at the cheese, Sandra!'
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