masthead image - an open book


(3 stories)

£3 for a small bag of spuds at Barrys. This dinner isn't going to be cheap as chips.


Osmon the Seventh
Was better known as the Odd
The naughtiest silliest Sultan
Ottoman Empire had ever got
Concubines they were many
Bought then were quickly forgotten
So wasn't really that naughty
They were cheaper by the dozen
Just silly forgetful and a bit odd

‘What’s all this white label stuff?’
‘It was so cheap Sandra.’
‘It’s cheaper for a reason.’
‘I tell you what wasn’t going cheap… the chickens.’
‘You and your white label jokes Tom.’